A year later he had an affair with the woman who lives across the street from us, and we divorced by mutual agreement. (She can experience as many as 15 tonic-clonic seizures—formerly known as grand-mal—a day.) So when she's sick, my ex stays home from work and cares for her, or I do; and we agree about most other things. Our 12-year-old daughter has severe epilepsy, takes four serious drugs every day, and her seizures are not yet controlled.They take turns in being with the children and their respective extended families."These school holidays, I am going to be overseas on a speaking tour, so Geoff is taking the children down to stay with mother," says Laurel.Couples who live together often have attitudes like: "I can leave any time," and "My money vs.your money" that married couples don't typically have."We felt it was a lot easier to be open about it.""Lorna really helped both of us challenge the norms and simply change the form of our marriage, and do what worked for us, rather than what 'everyone else did' or thought we should do. Next, we drew up and agreed a handful of guidelines around child care, finances, holidays, Christmas, socialising and dating other people. Then we both got on with living our 'separate but together' lives, and over time, it just became 'what we do'."In her frank blog, Laurel refers to the arrangement as "werewives and wasbands – a new form of marriage".Geoff says there is "less nagging" of each other, and fewer expectations, which makes for a much calmer living environment.
House prices up, divorce rates down * Prenup floating house can split apart if you divorce * Divorce court orders brick wall through house The couple say their two sons, then aged five and eight, were their first consideration in deciding on the living arrangement.
The couple, who live in Ponsonby, Auckland, estimate their decision is saving them around 00 a week, but they say they never set out to have such an arrangement.
It was a combination of factors, including the cost of housing in Auckland, that influenced their decision.
He pays our mortgage, the household bills, and medical insurance.
I pay for clothing, phones, and incidentals for our daughter, like school pictures, haircuts, and so on. You're living more contentedly with your ex-husband than most of the married women I hear from who live with their current husbands. At this point it might actually be advantageous for you to start dating. He's gallant, generous, does the dishes, loves your daughter, pays your mortgage, and enjoys getting drunk and sexy with you.
Truth: While the idea of "test driving" a car before you buy it is a good idea, it doesn't apply to marriage.