Teens don’t always necessarily recognize the time and work that goes into maintaining a household.I know I certainly didn’t understand how difficult it was until I moved out on my own. The more you demand they do things, or have a negative attitude, the more likely your teen will resist.Be specific in your questions to encourage real answers: is one of the easiest ways to stay connected. Make time in your schedule to go to a game or play and enjoy sharing in your teen’s talents. Sometimes you do have to make suggestions for improvement, but you can do those positively. For busy high schoolers, you might offer to read (or maybe re-read) the literature they have been assigned for English class.But remember, you're not there to help them get better at their activity; that will be perceived as a criticism, and they'll dread riding home with you. In other words, look for what your teen is doing right, at that moment. But it's embarrassing to pick up the phone in front of his friends and talk to his mom. ..involve them in the planning of the menu and the cooking.So I asked Elyse Suter, who had recently graduated from college and was working as my assistant, to help me write an article for the Aha! From Elyse: Finding common ground with your teen builds trust, understanding appreciation and affection.So as a 23 year old college graduate, here are my ideas for parents to connect with their teens -- some are specific, others general but I believe in all of them and hope they help to foster peace and understanding in every step. Teenagers often communicate much more than what they may seem to be saying on the surface.
Sure, much of it relates to electronics or social media.And bringing tea or a snack will melt your teen's heart.Teens can be guarded, but simply asking how the school day or a club meeting went will help them realize that you're actually interested in their day to day experience, not just their grades and achievements. After-school activities are often a large part of a teen’s life, so taking an interest in their preferred hobby is a great way to connect. But the more you comment on them, the more your teen feels like you don't love them, even if you say you do.Whether your team wins or loses, cheering together brings you closer.And sitting in the bleachers together feels special and gives you a lot of time to talk.But she's likely to be learning things at school that you'd find fascinating, so you might also let her tell you what she's just learned about Hemingway, or the Roman Empire.