This is known as the Scunthorpe Problem, after an incident in 1996 when AOL's rather simple-minded dirty-word filter prevented residents of several English towns and counties — among them S — from creating accounts with AOL because it matched strings within the town names to "banned" words.Since it also checked the town names against the postal codes, users from these towns could not get around it by entering modified versions of the names — they were darned if they did, darned if they didn't.While sexuality is not the determining factor in such differentiation, the issue of faithfulness, exclusion, deception and betrayal are.Similarly, there is some confusion between infidelity, an affair and extramarital sexuality. The marital infidelities of many famous people have been dealt with publicly. Actors and actresses have long provided endless material to the tabloids on affairs and infidelity. The good news is that extramarital affairs are survivable and marriages can even grow stronger when members of the couple deal constructively with the affair by facing it, apologizing and ultimately forgiving or by simply accepting it. Kennedy, Bill Clinton, Thomas Jefferson and French President Francois Mitterand (whose mistress stood beside his wife at his funeral) and other public figures, such as Prince Charles, Marion Barry, Gary Hart, Frank Gifford, poet James Dickey, writer John Cheever, Martin Luther King, television evangelist Jim Bakker and Representative Bob Livingston, Eleanor Roosevelt was strongly rumored to have had an affair with journalist Lorena Hickok and similar rumors surrounded Princess Diana extra marital affair.The professional literature in the last couple of decades has provided increasingly helpful information and assistance to therapists by presenting statistics and data, mapping the complexities of marital infidelity and articulating helpful models to assist couples through the crisis.
However, some authors adopt a moralistic and rigid view of affairs. An extensive list of References and Resources is provided below.Secret sexual or intimate online relationships constitute an affair even when they involve neither actual intercourse nor oral sex nor actual physical contact.Ignoring the fact that affairs are common and part human nature, their prescription for healing infidelity is that the "sinners" must fully confess and repeatedly atone before they can be forgiven by the victimized and betrayed spouses.The latter approach may be more harming than helping for couples in crisis as it often focuses on one-sided blame to the exclusion of the marital, sociological, evolutionary and technological (i.e. Another major misperception among lay people and psychotherapists is that extramarital relationships are never consensual and are always harming to the marital relationships.Another example is a man who discovers his homosexuality in the later part of his marriage and comes to an agreement with his wife that they will stay married but both will pursue extramarital sexual relationships.