Stereotypical dating profile long walks on the beach


“I’ve got a lot of strong opinions, and I’m not afraid to share them.” In other words, sign here right on the dotted line for a date filled with half-baked ideas gleaned from Sky News and over-confrontational attacks on the welfare system or Madonna.

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Any one of those could be great with some more detail.Notice how any of the so-called couples don’t seem to have been together that long? “If I can tell you’re gay when you first walk into the room, we probably won’t get on.” Well, I guess I had better leave my feather boa, Judy Garland tapes and tight lurex vests at home on our first date, and sit tight and try to be all manly on my fun evening out with a massively insecure homophobe.An irreversible wedge forever between them thanks to a passion for clothes that look like they were designed by committee. “Be prepared to lie if anyone asks where we met.” Oh, I *will*! The thing with douchebags like this is that, more often than not, they’re as big a Kylie obsessive as the rest of us – they just think it makes them, and us, a bad person.The sad fact is that they are blisteringly unoriginal, usually misguided (You’re a clapped-out Ford Mondeo? ) and say very little about your personality except that you’d rather come across as some clever wit on your profile than reveal anything else about yourself. So, as a public service, I’m going to tell you what I’ve noticed a lot of women saying in their profiles that is probably not a good idea.All of the following are based on actual openers from dating profiles I have perused over the years.

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